"Not me" Monday.

This form of weekly therapy was created my MckMama. This is way cheaper than the real thing. I'm sure one of these posts is long overdue...so here we go!
I did not leave my in-law's house yesterday with the leftover veggie/cream cheese dip and dessert I brought because I am just THAT much of a fat pig. I then did not devour the dip as my lunch today. Who brings home the leftover dish they brought to a party? NOT ME!
I did not let my one year old run around without a diaper on because he escaped yet again and I didn't feel like getting up to chase him around. He did not pee on the couch then look at me and laugh because I couldn't catch him in time.
I did not perfect the art of picking things up between my toes (lost paci, shoes, laundry) just so I don't have to bend over. That would just be lazy!
After Bryce pooped in the bathtub for the first time on Friday, I did not scoop the "evidence" out with a jimmy johns cup used for hair washing and dump it in the toilet. I certainly did not leave the tub and toys unwashed for 3 days and just give him a bath in another bathtub so I didn't have to scrub everything down.
I did not sit out in the sun today in a WAY too small bathing suit top covering my new giant preggo boobs and my regular underwear in defiance of the maternity bathing suit I loathe! (I did wear a cover-up, but still...)